Deciding upon which places to register for one's wedding registry is not trivial. Anyone who has been through this dilemma should feel free to chime in.
Over time Kelsey and I have been given various 'commandments' concerning wedding registration. Years ago my good friend Angela told me about a code of etiquette that prohibits putting the places of registration on the wedding invitation. For whatever reason, the Mormon community has yet to be fully convinced of this degree. Thus, in a compromise, we will not be putting where we are registered on our invitation; however we will be putting our wedding website address on the invitation where folks can indeed find out where we are registered.
Appeasing two codes of ethics at once—check.
The next aphorism we received was to avoid registering at more than two or three places. If you are indecisive, like we are, deciding on only two or three stores is a reality that must exist in some alternate universe. To attempt to explain our plight let's take a look at the field of box stores and match it up with the needs of the players.
Thinking about the layout of an apartment generalized coordinate zones we have:
1) Kitchen
2) Bathroom
3) Bedroom
4) Furniture
5) Home Decor
6) Odds and Ends.
Now we make two assumptions.
Assumption One: Typically, when two people decide to get married they each have some things in each of these categories, but never really have a complete set for any of these 5-6 zones and thus need to reach out into each of these zones on the wedding registry.
Assumption Two: When buying something, especially at the beginning of a life together with someone, there is a certain amount of desire to get something that is both const effective (i.e. not ostentatiously extravagant) while durable and of high utilitarian quality. (Editors note: Ryan is writing this entry, so this is clearly biased towards a guy's perception of a wedding registry. Girls will also require an aesthetic feel that guys will not be able to easily predict. This stipulation is often met by having a large variety of designs available in the store or stores of choice for a registry.)
So now lets go down the list and see what matches up by asking what is (are) the best store (stores) for each of these 6 zones.
Kitchen - gotta be Williams-Sonoma. It's high end and for all those neat kitchen gadgets and nice-looking salt shakers, it cuts the mustard and the mustard seed with the sushi knives. For more run-of the mill every-day need kitchen appliances like corning ware and glass ware, there's Sears and Target.
Bathroom - oddly, the bathroom seems to be the place where, when it comes to decor, cuteness far out does utility. The vivacious patterns of the shower curtain and extra plush spot rug must be there to make up for all the gosh-darn utility of the basic functions of a bathroom! Certainly, there is Bed, Bath and Beyond, but strangely we found that, at least online, Target has a pretty darn good showing of 'pretty' bathroom decor. Apparently, since quality is really not such a high demand, anyone can design cute things so quality in this category becomes less necessary.
Bedroom - well, Bed, Bath and Beyond does indeed start with the word 'Bed' so maybe that would be a good place to start. However, we found the Macy's has a really good selection of excellent quality bedding. Bed, Bath and Beyond, is really one of those mega-super-store materializations akin to what the supermarket was to the fresh markets. Meanwhile, the 'anchors' of malls are and continue to be department stores. Macy's seems to be one of the more successful department stores. (Must be because of the Macy's parade.) And it shows by all their selection of bedding and also their nice collection of things kitchen. Kelsey could also have some fun in the clothes department....
Furniture - when it comes to quality of furniture there is lots of debate. When it comes to low cost furniture there is also lots of second-hand, craig's list, discount store options from which to choose. But when it comes to quality AND cost effectiveness there's only one store that really maximizes both head and shoulders above the rest—IKEA. Plus, Ikea matches much of the furniture we already have. Ikea is also a great place to find good home decor.
Home Decor - just to be pedantic, let me repeat the last sentence of the previous paragraph, 'Ikea is also a great place to find good home decor.' Also, there's Target which really must not be overlooked for it's ease to get to and relatively (compared to Ikea) greater ease to get into and out of without buying the store.
Odds and Ends - Target's gift cards are a coveted treasure for they enable purchasing power after the dust has settled and you realize that you actually need to get batteries for all of the 24 wall clocks you got off your registry (how did that happen?)! Also, another really important one to most grooms is Sears! Power Tools!!!! With all this decorating and fancy-schamcy stuff, men need to compensate by getting tools to feel like they can be useful. This really is a good compromise because tools can be purchased and then put away so that wife is happy because the house or apartment looks good and the hubby is happy because he knows that he can fix anything whenever he wants to because the tools are in a box in a bin in the basement. (Just kidding, Ryan will keep good care of the tools!)
Ok, so let's sum up: (Keep in mind, we haven't actually registered at any of these places yet; we are still deciding and hopeful to cut this list down.)
Williams-Sonama for high-end kitchen stuff.
Target for the bathroom.
Macy's for the bedroom and bedding.
Ikea for furniture, home decor, and odds & ends.
Target for home decor and odds & ends.
Sears for tools, kitchen appliances and odds & ends.
Bed, Bath and Beyond for the beyond.
Sunday night Kelsey and I picked up our friend Jes at the airport. We began talking about wedding registries (because what else is there to talk about?) and explained our dilemma. I asked her how many places she would register at and she said, 'just two or three.' I started listing off the places we were considering while inquiring which she would choose. After three or four places she paused and admitted that, 'yeah... that will be hard.'
Our current vote is with all of the above except for Bed, Bath, and Beyond because, after careful deliberation we've decided that we don't need any Beyond for our wedding because we'll already have Eternity!!!
Stay tuned for Wedding Registry, Part II!
finally, this site is ready for an initial public alpha test (we're not at beta yet). this means that it has the finalized format, the basic elements, and a few of the details some of which are tentative. so far this has a home, an incomplete about us page, pictures, announcement, details of ca and vt, an rsvp form, and this blog. i put the picture of kelsey up top because she has been my inspiration through it all. not just designing this web site, obviously, but since before i even started dating her. she was always distinguished herself with an exuberance towards life natural inclination to do good and be kind.
ryan.
